Chapter 23: Alliances
It took far longer than I expected to regain my senses. I felt hollowed out. I felt drunk. I felt like I had ridden the world’s fastest rollercoaster.
“How can you do that with a kiss?” I asked.
I noticed that Fiona’s face had flushed as well, “I believe that we both did that. Like dancing, this takes two people to get the proper experience.”
“Dancing, I hope you lead well. Because I’m pretty hopeless.”
“You are not. Now, I wanted to enjoy a moment with you before I moved to our next topic.”
“What? Why is that?” I asked.
“Because the topic I wish to discuss is your Amy.”
“Oh,” I said, “That topic.”
“I hope that this does not scare you. I have nothing but the best intentions here. I accept your relationship with Amy.”
“I feel like that statement has a ‘but’ following it,” I said.
“Yes. But I worry about your relationship with her. I worry it will supersede any relationship we develop. Your relationship with her developed without formal courting. At least I assume there was no official courting. I judge natural attraction to be stronger than attraction derived from courtship. She is your personal maid. She already knows you on a more intimate and comfortable level than I do. And you already put a great amount of trust in her daily. How do I compete?”
I searched her eyes. She looked resolute. I could see no trace of the worry to which she was admitting.
“Ok, there’s a lot there. So, bear with me, because I want to address all of it,” I said. "Our relationship developed through a comedy of errors that turned romantic. I had turned over my new leaf and had not realized how much this would startle people. And in the midst of explaining that I was turning over a new leaf to Amy, I outed myself as gay. Not that I am ashamed of being gay. But I hadn’t intended to bring it up. Your announcement that you wished to court me was flattering and romantic. And it was romantic in a way that I’ve never experienced before. I’m going to cherish both memories. But they are so different, I would hesitate to compare them.”
“Thank you,” Fiona said, “Many people find my manner brusque and blunt. I am relieved that you seem not to take offense to these qualities.”
“I appreciate and respect those qualities. And that is the other point. You worry about the intimacy that Amy has by her being my personal maid. She worries about the drama and romance that you generate by being able to defend me with a sword and musket.”
“Does she? Fiona asked.
“She does. And I worry that I am being unfair to both of you by doing this at all.”
“We are a confused trio then,” Fiona said. “But I have said my piece. I do not expect some dramatic change from you. I wanted you to know my concern, because I trust you to keep it in mind as you go through life and make choices. I hope I have not been too forward."
I coughed, “Could we move to the smoking room. I can feel the weakness returning.”
“Then the herbs do not speed the healing, but mask the symptoms?” Fiona said.
“Looks like that is the case,” I nodded. “I’m doing a lot of that lately.”
* * *
I spent the rest of the day at Myrddhin House. Fiona and I talked and swapped stories. I learned about her mother, the previous countess. I learned about her childhood training to be countess, and training to be a monster hunter. I told her stories from the rival’s backstory. I mixed in personal stories about my own understanding of my sexuality. And I added my own embellishments about how I felt obligated to date men to produce an heir from a good family.
I did not ask to stay the night in a guest room. Despite Aunt Cecile’s recommendation, I was not willing to leave Amy alone. I was not willing to leave her with no allies in a house with traitors who knew who we were. My carriage hadn't survived. And so, Fiona sent me home in one of her carriages. And before I left, we agreed to meet the next day to discuss our course of action. As it was the requiem tomorrow, the game’s version of the weekend, Amy would have the day off. And so all of us counter-conspirators could speak together. Fiona gave me an electric goodbye kiss as she helped me into the carriage. And then she sent me on my way.
* * *
I opened the door to my room and walked in. Quincy danced in spirals at my feet as I went. I leaned on my cane but walked under my own power. Amy stood at my bookshelf. She held a feather duster and was reaching up to dust the top shelves. Standing on tiptoes, the crinoline under her skirt was visible. As the door opened, she turned around.
“Ren! You’ve come back to me! I expected you to stay the night at Myrddhin House.”
“If I’d been spending the night, I’d have taken my personal maid,” I smiled, “And besides I wasn’t leaving you alone and undefended.”
“I’m sorry. Did things not go well with the countess?”
“They went fine. But, perhaps I need your comfort.” I took another step towards Amy, but my cane caught on the carpet. I stumbled. Amy ran to me. My left ankle buckled, but I managed to brace with my cane to compensate. Amy wrapped her arms around me and leaned in to provide support. With her help, I pushed myself back to my feet.
“Well, I had meant to be sexy and enticing, but I botched it.”
Amy kissed my cheek, “You did fine. Now you said something about needing comfort?”
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